Friday, May. 28, 2004
4:31 p.m.
the kids were very good today.
i forgot to mention about the sleepyhead kissing me last week after i got back from vacation. now, i'm pretty affectionate with the kids and i let them hug me and kiss me on the cheek and stuff, except for this was waaaay not appropriate. okay, first of all, it was on my mouth and second of all, this kid has never, ever done anything like that before. probably if he were under the age of 8, it would have been okay, but the kid is 14 and everyone thinks he probably thinks i'm his girlfriend. second, this continues this whole thing of seventh grade boys crushing on me. and that's not okay either. third, it's just gross when a kid has a crush on you, okay. it's not flattering. it's gross knowing that 14 year old boys...ewwwww!
i get to sleep in tomorrow morning, sort of. i've got to go at 10:30 to meet with the guy about fixing my car.
oh, i forgot another thing about the sleepyhead yesterday. i took him to the popeye's, just like every week. every week, he tries to go into the liquor store a few shops down from the restaurent. yesterday, he got up and ran out of the popeye's and into the liquor store. he grabbed a candy bar and started eating it behind the liquor store counter. while he did that, he laughed hysterically. then, the liquor store guy started yelling at the sleepyhead that he was going to call the police. of course i was thinking, "what the hell are the police going to do to him?" but i didn't say it. damn, why couldn't the sleepyhead have made a scene inside the starbuck's like i've been waiting for him to do. his mom told me today that he tore $14 into lots of tiny peices. i took him to a garage sale today where he picked out a toy for a quarter.
i saw an animal that looked like a beaver only it didn't have a flat, leathery tail. right after that, i saw a cat vomit.
Sunday, May. 30, 2004
8:47 p.m.
sean connery. not hot at all.
same goes with kevin costner.
it seems like i know more men than women who think sean connery is attractive. i think it says something about what men think women find appleaing.
Saturday, May. 29, 2004
5:49 p.m.
there are firetrucks driving by!
Saturday, May. 29, 2004
5:23 p.m.
ahhh...finally, an evening in. i'm going to watch a movie on hbo maybe. i wish i didn't have to be up early as tonight would be a good night to drink. before that though, i'm going to read an article on restraining children.
the rat seems pretty happy that i've cleaned her cage again.
the movie "the next karate kid." what a load of suckage.
Saturday, May. 29, 2004
10:39 p.m.
i found out this weekend that christian would have been one of my students when he was a kid. isn't that cute!? (excuse me while i vomit)
Friday, May. 28, 2004
9:47 p.m.
so i've decided. the first thing i'm going to do when i graduate from here is get a job teaching in either a correctional facility or a facility for kids who are wards of the state. hopefully, i'll find one i can do part time so i can go to school full time and finish my doc. in 5 years. but if i can't find a part time job, i'll go to school part time and work full time for two years, save up a bunch of money and then go to school full time and maybe not work so i can catch up and still finish in 5 years. i think i'll try to find a part-time teaching job even if i get a fellowship. (please god please, let me get a big fellowship.)
and i need to talk to my boyfriend about all of this. i'm scared though, that he'll tell me not to come there. i'm scared he'll say he's still not ready. in which case i'll pretend the last year and a half never happened. and make baltimore my permenent home. or maybe go to hawaii (they're hiring sped teachers and will pay moving costs) or florida to be near my father (who i worry is aging). but i hate the thought of those options.
i'm ready to be part of a couple who goes out and does normal stuff together. and who takes care of each other and makes sure evertyhing is okay. i didn't think i'd ever feel this way again. but thinking about someday doing silly things like taking the cat to the ball park makes me happy and i need things like that today.
Friday, May. 28, 2004
9:46 p.m.
i told christian that someday we should take raoul to fenway park. he agreed.
who isn't jealous about how cool my boyfriend is? don't try to deny it.
Friday, May. 28, 2004
9:08 p.m.
okay, i'm going to curl up in bed with with my just recieved today journal of behavioral disorders. and that cats. don't forget the cats. i wish christian were here.
Friday, May. 28, 2004
8:38 p.m.
oh my god if you knew about the headache i have right now ouch it hurts i'm going to bed very soon i found out today i'm getting a pay-cut plus i lost my wallet a couple of weeks ago and crashed my car and got a b+ in a class and i'm tired and the cable was out and can't someone, ANYONE DO SOMETHING ABOUT MY POOR HEAD!?
Friday, May. 28, 2004
1:08 p.m.
okay, so i went to maaco this morning to get an estimate. they want $1550 to fix everything. i was able to talk them down to $1300. but i don't think i'm going to go there because everyone says they are way too expensive.
also, a guy from the pheer board is going to sell me a bumper and headlights for $100. that alone should save me about $180. he's also offered to do any of the work he can do which will hopefully save me megabucks. so yeah, i'm not too hopeful yet, but i'm going to meet with him on monday.
i'm sure he'll be able to tell me a place to go other than maaco where i can get everything done for a lot less. oh i hope. this whole thing is stressing me out.
i haven't eaten lunch yet.
Friday, May. 28, 2004
12:51 p.m.
Friday, May. 28, 2004
9:25 p.m.
so i rear-ended a lady. and my car's sort of bashed up and i was a little annoyed. then, i just found out that my insurance company won't be covering the damage since i don't have collision coverage. uhg, i thought i had everything i would need to have. i fucking have uninsured motorist coverage, but nothing to cover my car if something happens to it. so yeah, i'm going to call mike to see if he knows a place where i can get it done.
anyway, i was just driving west on 450 which isn't the normal way i take on a day when i don't normally have to go that way. there was a lady stopped at a yellow light. and i came up a hill and was about 75 feet from her. the moment i stepped on my brakes, i slid. i pumped the brakes, but just kept sliding. uhg. the tow hitch for her tahoe bashed in the hood of my car and that's the main damage. at least my car is running fine other than the air conditioner blowing too humid. and i've got lots of money saved up but not enough to meet the $10,000 goal i had for january but that might still be possible if i keep working my ass off this summer.
it's been 10 years since i've been in an accident (other than a few altercations with the dumpster by my last building). it was probably time for me to have one anyway.
Thursday, May. 27, 2004
2:48 p.m.
i'm going to activate my check card now.
Thursday, May. 27, 2004
11:54 a.m.
11:54
it is now 5 minutes until 12. the cable guy, who was supposed to be here sometime between 10 and 12 is still not here. what should i do? should i call them? and when i do, what should i say?
12:01
okay, i'm on hold right now. oh, they just said he's on his way. and the telephone just rang for me to let him in. i hope he's not mad that i called them. what if he is? what will i do!?
12:08
currently, we are discussing my tv set. i told him, "whatever you do, don't turn it off." and then i told him how old that tv is and how you can't find a tv that will last 20 years anymore.
12:15
oh! he's plugged something in to the outlet to see if it's working right. it went "beep." raoul is watching with interest. i am pretending to read a journal article on repeated viewings of blue's clues. there are also some wires connected to the cable box.
12:18
he keeps coming into and leaving the apartment. i don't think he knows what's wrong with it.
12:20
he's back. and he's got something else plugged into the wall. he's looking in the closet behind the cable outlet. this article is pretty interesting.
12:38
okay, so the cable's back on. the guy says i was "disconnected in error and that's why it took me so long," whatever that means. i'm going to watch the love boat and take a nap now.
Thursday, May. 27, 2004
10:57 a.m.
the cable company just called to tell me they'll have someone out here today. i wasn't sure what to say, so i said, "okay. thanks." i hope they get here sometime between 10 and 12.
Thursday, May. 27, 2004
9:17 a.m.
so i went to work this morning. great! i'm supposed to have my cable appointment sometime between 10 and 12. they said, "when the guy calls, make sure you answer." but i left the cell phone in the car because i wasn't expecting him to call at 8:06 when my appointment isn't until sometime between 10 and 12. so i called the cable company and was like, "i'm not going to have to wait another day, am i? because if my appointment isn't until sometime between 10 and 12 of course i'm not going to be at home at 8." (a rare moment of assertiveness on my part, don't you think?) anyway, the guy on the phone was very patronizing. i could have kicked him in the groin.
Thursday, May. 27, 2004
9:36 p.m.
so yeah, something bit me on my face. there are two little red marks and it itches. and i'm such a loser because i've got some sort of thing on my face.
i had a good time on my vacation. but it was too short. and now i'm back to being at home and lonely. that sucks. but at least the cats are here, so i don't really know what i'm complaining about.
plus, i'm going to make some more of that yummy stirfry tomorrow. plus, i'm about to go to bed (alone) in a few minutes.
this sucks, you know. and i'm sick of it. and i often wonder if it's worth my time and energy and money to deal with all of this. and everytime i'm about to decide that it's not, i suddenly realize that it is.
in all of oklahoma there wasn't one person i could stand. so instead of just being content with being alone, i had to choose someone from halfway across the country.
i've got to stop screwing up.
additionally, i went to the carwash to finally clean the spot on my car that wouldn't come clean for anything. but now it's raining.
Wednesday, May. 26, 2004
4:56 p.m.
my cable isn't working.
Wednesday, May. 26, 2004
12:29 p.m.
i'm on vacation. i'm sleepy. we're going to the pirate museum today. last night, i fell down. before i started drinking, even.
mmm...i think i'll have a reece's cup.
who can guess how long it will take me to put on my shoes?
Tuesday, May. 25, 2004