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7:39 p.m.
i did something to my pinky on my left hand. it hurts very much and is swollen and i can hardly bend it. what should i do? other than cry and cry until the tears come down?
Sunday, Jun. 06, 2004

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10:25 p.m.
why yes, i will have a cigarette. thanks.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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10:20 p.m.
i watched 28 days later and still didn't like it. hmm.

now, i'll watch gunsmoke.

my nails are looking pretty good.

i had to email christian and tell him to stop sending me pictures of george bush.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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7:45 p.m.
today when i pulled up to the sleepyhead's house, the neighbor man was outside. he said he'd noticed the way i interact with the sleepyhead. he said, "you seem so nice to him, like you really care about him. the last lady didn't seem like that. but you seem really patient with him." that really made my day because even though i'm sort of pissed at the sleepyhead for trying to make it with my foot yesterday, i still love him dearly and hope he gets over the cold he's had.

that little squinty kid who i have who is so cute did a silly thing. he was walking, then he pulled down his shorts (he still wears dipars) and said, "uh-oh!" then pulled them back up. it was hilarious.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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7:18 p.m.
you know, i just don't feel it for the addams family. the joke is old, you know. i like the munsters because they also have normal family stuff going on, people aren't just being freaked out by them.

i'm also really glad that ronald reagan died. is that horrible for me to say? good, i'm glad. because how fucking horrible was it when he turned all those crazy people out onto the street. what about when he didn't do anything about apartheid except ignore it? was that not as horrible as what i just said? what about that fine government he help establish in afghanistan in the fight against communism? was that less horrible that me saying i'm glad he died? what about the war on drugs or the exponential increase in the number of incarcerated persons during his administration? i can't think of one good thing he did.

i'll also be happy when dick cheney, donald rumsfeld, paul wolfowitz and that bitch condoleeza rice die, too.

also, i think bush should have said reagan left behind a mess he helped create.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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6:37 p.m.

these are supposed to be me and christian. but they don't really look like us at all. if we looked like this couple, i'd be pretty happy. i'm still happy. but i'd be really happy.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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7:38 a.m.
i've slept and slept and slept during the last 24 hours. i've slept 12 hours of the last 24 hours. and i've had fairly decent dreams.
Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004

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9:44 p.m.
this is the start of a list of things i do not want to do before i die:

1. participate in any sort of birth.
Friday, Jun. 04, 2004

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9:07 p.m.
1. the fire alarms in the building have been going off for almost 10 minutes and the trucks are just getting here even though the station is right around the corner. there are people outside. i smelled something burning when i came in, but couldn't smell it when i got to my apartment so i think it's somewhere else and everything's okay or there would be more trucks outside. will you please shut that fucking bell off please!? the cats are freaking out about it.

2. the sleepyhead totally tried to do it with my foot and then my leg today and then he tried to get me to put my hand on his privates. then, when i redirected* him, he kept hitting me because he was mad because i wouldn't let him molest me. it must be so hard for him to be 13 and normally developing physically but only a few years old cognatively.

3. the sleepyhead has also started biting himself on the arm. the best thing to do if he does is to look the other way. he will then try to position himself in your line of sight. keep looking away and he will stop. the whole thing lasts no more than 5-10 seconds.

4. will someone please shut off this fucking bell already!?

*christian says the word redirect sounds like reprogramming or something. he asked me if that is an actual term and i told him that it is and that it means that you try to make a kid interested in something more appropriate than what he or she is doing. so like, one of the things i do with the sleepyhead is if he's looking around and not doing his work, i'll put his hand on his work and he'll start doing it again. that's about all that means, but it's a very important strategy as it avoid sr+ of the (f)behavior.
Friday, Jun. 04, 2004

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9:51 p.m.
so jobess, joey and i have been internet stalking agnes and sadie. actually, we've been stalking sadie every since brian became sadie, a mtftm (male to female to male transexual [i'm not joking here]). but agnes and sadie have decided to make their public internet life more private and jobess, joey and i are all very sad.

but here's the deal. sadie and agnes are in love and stuff. agnes lives in the UK and sadie lives by me, in dc only closer to va (which some people say isn't that close, but really, when you've lived in the plain states, you know that it it is). so agnes and sadie are getting married so that agnes can move here. but we've been trying to figure that out since they are both girls. but then something occured to me. agnes might be a guy. like, agnes might be a guy living as a girl. and if she hasn't legally changed her sex to female, then it would work fine, right?

so joey has emailed them guised as a law student interested in transgender law and asked them to tell him more about thier immagration stuff. but they never write back. so we're convinced that the trail we were so hot on, is cold.
Wednesday, Jun. 02, 2004

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9:36 p.m.
it's like one solid rumble of thunder outside right now. i love it. there was lightning in the clouds.

i didn't sleepy well last night at all. i dreamed of the kids. and i would take care of them until new homes could be found for them. little squints went to live with a grandfatherly man and while i was sad to see him go, i knew it was for the best. i'll be so sad to leave the sleepyhead. and i know he'll be sad when he doesn't get to see me, too.
Wednesday, Jun. 02, 2004

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7:59 p.m.
i got some good news today. as of june 30, i will have turner classic movies! only jen understands how exciting this is to me.
Wednesday, Jun. 02, 2004

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7:26 p.m.
so i bought a car. an accord with 108,000 miles on it. but oooh, it has a sunroof which i've been dreaming of for 7-8 years. and cruise control which you can't really use around here for all the stop and go.

i keep trying to tell myself that yes, buying a new car was a good idea. and i know the reason i had so much money saved up was so that if something like this happened, i would be equipped to deal with it, but still. i'm stressed out about it.

even though i've only eaten a small bag of pretzels and two beef taquitios at 7-11 and had four mountain dew code reds in the past few days, my stomach has been very upset. plus, my shoulder is killing me. as is the arthritis in my right hip. i'm ready to stop worrying.
Wednesday, Jun. 02, 2004

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2:06 p.m.
so i guess i'm going to buy a new car as both of the estimates i got today for for about $2700. this is both very depressing and exciting because i won't be able to get anything nicer than what i had before. except for the new one will have a muffler. and the air conditioner will work 100% of the time instead of 85% of the time. otherwise, the fact that i'm going to be buying a new car is depressing because my current vehicle is still damn good. until i had that accident, i thought i would be spending today getting the muffler fixed. i guess not. oh well, such is life.

does anyone have a car they want to sell me? whatever it is, i want it to be an automatic transmission. with power steering. is that asking too much?

i think i might be willing to pay extra money for a sun roof.
Tuesday, Jun. 01, 2004

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8:09 p.m.
i will now eat a plate of pancakes.

i would say if i'm like anyone in pulp fiction, it's fabienne. i would like to be esmerelda villalobos.
Monday, May. 31, 2004

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6:28 p.m.
did anyone like the movie 28 days later? i tried to watch it, but then i couldn't. i called christian and told him and he acted like i'm some sort of fool. i just thought it was dumb. maybe i'll try to watch it again today. i was really keen on seeing it. maybe it's just because being a girl sucks right now. or maybe it's because i've become so pretentious i don't know what to do. or maybe it's because that movie actually sucks.
Monday, May. 31, 2004


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